The Big Picture

I want to know now. I want to have all the information now. I need it. I deserve it. I can take it! Sometimes I get demanding of God. I figure He needs a talking to. He needs to know how desperate I am. He’s not letting me in on the big picture and it’s bugging me! This is my life! Yes, I gave it over to Him but I still want control!

Recently we ordered our son an ipod for his birthday. Zach was excited to say the least. He waited everyday for the FedEx truck to come. At the end of the week, Voila! Except the box that arrived was marked Box 1 of 2 and filled with the software we’d also ordered. “It’s never going to come!” he moaned. With the Internet we could find Box 2 with the click of a mouse.

We had ordered online and now we could track the package. We looked at the FedEx website and found our tracking number. Then everyday we could watch the progress of Zach’s ipod. The route was far different then we anticipated, for one thing it started out in Shanghai, China! We watched it arrive in Anchorage, Alaska. Then it took off and flew to Indianapolis, Indiana where it spent the night. A day later the ipod was sent to Oakland, California where it spent the weekend. Bright and early Monday morning the doorbell rang and at 9:27 AM I signed for the package. It was all recorded online, we checked to see. It was amazing.

When we ordered the gift online it felt like we were shopping locally, though yes I know the Internet provides a global economy to my desktop. But knowing Apple is a California company it was surprising to find out that the ipod started out in China. Waiting a few days was okay. Still our package made several bounces and pit stops before getting to us. Alaska? Indiana? Why did it have to go there? It made sense to FedEx but to us it seemed like a strange route.

What does all this have to do with my being bugged by God not letting me in on the big picture? Let me explain. FedEx handles millions of packages every night; they all get routed just where they are supposed to go. I am not trying to give a commercial for overnight shipping but they have perfected delivery to an art form. They see all the items and in a grand design they sort and ship in the most efficient way. They see the big picture. With a tracking number on the box they can locate any item and tell you where it is but they do not give you a reason for why it is flying over California to Indiana before returning. God doesn’t give us all the reasons for His routing system either. There is no website for us to log on to find out where the next step in our lives is going, or for that matter, where the next important step is coming from. We have to trust God. There it is, the hard part: Trust God. We have to have faith knowing He has the big picture in mind. He knows why it will take weeks (years) for a package to arrive safely on our doorstep at just the right time. He won’t explain it all to us we probably wouldn’t get it.

We all have free will, when you factor that into the big picture sometimes the route takes longer. We can mess up the big picture. What if I had decided that a friend in Indianapolis could go to FedEx and pick up the package to hold for me since I’d be visiting in two days? But the big picture called for the package to go to Oakland next in only one day. My friend misses getting the box and off it goes to Oakland. I miss the home delivery since I’m in Indianapolis visiting. Now I delay getting the gift for a week because I stepped in thinking I knew better. I messed it up. I still get the package, I just made it harder on myself. I didn’t trust FedEx to deliver.

I don’t always trust God to deliver. I think He could solve this problem for me by just telling me what is going on! But there’s that free will thing again. God is not in the business of controlling our lives He gives us choices all the time and then He works within the decision we make.

In this information age it’s difficult to accept “taking it on faith” but I think it’s the very thing that keeps me coming back to God. I have to check in with Him more often if I don’t know what is going on. I pray. I learn to trust Him. He always delivers but with a routing system that makes sense to His big picture. There might be adventures in Anchorage and Indianapolis I know nothing about, maybe my package was picking some very good stuff I hadn’t even ordered! I have to trust, and that is the hardest part.

Posted 7/12/2006 @ 7:31 PM | Weekly Thoughts